I Wish I Had The Words
My father passed away unexpectedly last night. He was 58. He passed peacefully in his sleep of what appears at the moment to be a heart attack. He leaves his wife (my mom), and three children, of whom I am the eldest.
As I talk about at Christmas, my parents live a considerable distance from us, and I will be traveling there soon and I am not sure when exactly I am coming back. The blog will be quiet this week. I have a lot of things to say, but not really motivated to commit them to typeface at the moment.
Thank you for your understanding.
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January 19th, 2009 at 9:21 am
I am so sorry for your unexpected loss…I read your blog regularly and you are an inspiration. God Bless and I will be thinking of you and your family during this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:32 am
Hi,
I am really sorry to hear that your father has passed away. I know how difficult this must be for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
May God bless you and your family during this time and always,
Rendell
January 19th, 2009 at 9:35 am
I am so sorry, I can’t even come up with the words right now. You know what’s important and that’s your family. You are in my prayers. Many hugs for you and yours.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:37 am
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:41 am
What terrible news. My heart goes out to you…
January 19th, 2009 at 9:42 am
My deepest sympathies. Take time to accept and grieve your loss. Everything else can wait.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:46 am
58. Wow, how sad. Best wishes to you.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:53 am
I’m very sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:59 am
I’m so sorry – you and yours are in my prayers. God bless.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:03 am
I am so sorry. I know that nothing anyone says will help much in your grieving. Please know that all of your blog readers are thinking of you and your family.
Be careful going home.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:10 am
I am so sorry about your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:12 am
I cannot tell you how much I feel for you. Please take care.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:20 am
i am so sorry to hear this. good thoughts to you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:26 am
Please accept our sympathy and wishes for your family to get through this difficult time with as much love and support as you need.
Our prayers are with you.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:32 am
I am so, so sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:35 am
I’m so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:37 am
I am so very sorry for your loss. He was so young…and I’m sure with the unexpectedness of this grieving will take some extra time. Take care of you and those you love. We’ll be here when you’re up to blogging again. Many prayers of peace for you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:39 am
So Sorry for your loss, be safe travelling.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:43 am
I know I speak for many of your readers when I say that I feel like I know you…I know this must be heartbreaking for you and your family; you are in our thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:43 am
My sincere condolences. I wish you the best in the difficult days ahead.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:46 am
Very sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family at this sad time. May good memories of your father help you through this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:51 am
I so sorry for your sudden loss. Our thoughts are with you.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:54 am
Saying a prayer for you and your family, from way down here in Texas.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:55 am
I am sorry to hear about your loss. I pray you and your family will find God’s peace during this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:55 am
Thoughts and prayers go with you. Take care of yourself, too, through this rough time.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:59 am
I am so sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:00 am
We will be praying for you and you family – I can’t imagine what you are going through. Safe travels to you – don’t worry about us, we’ll be here when you get back.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:01 am
I am so sorry for you loss, praying for safe travels.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:05 am
My deepest sympathies for your sudden loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:14 am
I am so sorry for the loss of your Dad.
Take good care.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:15 am
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. A sudden death like you’ve experienced is even more difficult to deal with than death after illness when you’ve had longer to come to terms with the mortality of a loved one. Condolences from me and the entire Lifehacker staff.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:16 am
My dad passed away last year just short of his 60th birthday, in his sleep, of a heart attack. It was, and still is, the single most difficult event of my entire life. I’m so sorry to hear of your loss – my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family through this difficult time…
January 19th, 2009 at 11:17 am
I’m so sorry for your loss. Please know there are lots of us out here in blogland who are thinking about you and your family at this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:17 am
I’m so sorry to hear about your father. My thoughts and prayers go out to your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:17 am
My deepest sympathies on your loss. My thoughts are with you today.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:22 am
My deepest condolences to you and your family. Take care of yourself first. Your readers will be here waiting to support you when you return.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:22 am
my condolences to you and your family. i am so sorry to hear your sad news. please take care.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:22 am
I’m so sorry to hear this. Your family is in my prayers. Travel safely. ((hugs))
January 19th, 2009 at 11:25 am
I am so sorry. Please let us know if there is anything that we can do from here. Drive safe and know that you are in my thoughts.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:28 am
I’m so sorry to hear about your father. Travel safely, and take comfort in your family.
We’re thinking of you.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:29 am
I am sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you, your mom, your siblings, and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:35 am
I am so sorry. May you find comfort and solace in the ones you love.
January 19th, 2009 at 11:37 am
I’m so sorry to hear that, Jaimie. May perpetual light shine on him and may your family find comfort in this time of loss. No rush to commit things to typeface. *e-hugs*
January 19th, 2009 at 11:55 am
I follow your blog but hav enever posted but I must tell you today how very sorry I am! My thoughts and prayers are with you in this difficult time!
January 19th, 2009 at 11:57 am
I’m so very sorry. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
My deepest sympathies to you and yours.
I cannot even imagine the heartache. I’m truly sorry.
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, and many hugs go out to you from a distance.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:25 pm
Oh my goodness! I’m so, so sorry for your unexpected loss! Prayers for you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
I too am so sorry to hear of your Father’s sudden passing. We will be praying for you and your family. May God comfort you all.
Blessings
January 19th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
I’m so sorry to hear this terrible news. It’s so hard not to get to say a real goodbye. I hope your travels are safe and please be ever so gentle with yourself and those you love. Big, big hugs.
Peg
January 19th, 2009 at 12:39 pm
My condolences, Jaimie. I’m going through something similar at the moment. Seek comfort in your family and friends, and remember that the blog is secondary.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:40 pm
I am so sorry to hear of your Father’s sudden passing. My prayers and thoughts are with you, your mom, your siblings, and your family.
May your memories bring some comfort dung this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Oh my gosh! I am so sorry that you have to deal with this at such an early age – that you and your siblings have lost your father and that your mother has lost her husband. 58 is so young. I can’t imagine getting that phone call – my heart always feels like the bottom is dropping out when my phone rings in the middle of the night. I’ll remember you and your family in my prayers. May God bless.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:49 pm
Your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
I am so sorry to hear. I’m praying for you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I’m so sorry that your dad passed away. My dad was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disease when he was 54, and it caused kidney failure. He’s been on dialysis for nearly 8 years now, and has spent several months in the hospital with various complications. There were several times when he’s been close to death, although right now he’s holding his own. I’m so sorry that your dad’s death was unexpected, and my heart goes out to you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:00 pm
I’m sorry to hear about your father. I hope you get comfort with the memory of the time you spent with him.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Please travel safely.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
I am so very sorry for your loss. I am thinking of you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
I’ll be praying for you. May your travels be safe.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
I am sadden by your loss. I wish the best for you and your family. And have a safe trip.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:15 pm
I’m very sorry to hear about your loss. I would be devastated if my father passed away. I wish the best for and your family in this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:17 pm
I’m so very sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
So sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:29 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
My thoughts are with you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
I’m so very sorry to see of your father’s passing. It’s such a shock. My dad died when I was 16, it’s a horrible thing to go through. Blessings and peace to you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:36 pm
I was so sorry to hear of your loss. My heart goes out to you-your father was so young! (I lost my father more than 15 yrs ago & my mother last yr–it is really rough). I hope you are pulling through all right–it will be healing to spend time with your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
So sorry to hear this news. I wish you and your family the best as you deal with your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:42 pm
I subscribe to your blog and it’s been a great source of inspiration and encouragement. May God be with you and your family during this sad and difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
I’m so sorry to hear about your sudden loss. My condolences to you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
I’m very sorry for your loss. I just discovered your blog a few months ago and though I don’t usually comment, I love when I see a new post in my GoogleReader. You have been a huge source of inspiration to tackling what seems like a very overwhelming amount of non-mortgage debt. Take the time to be with your family and you’ll be in my thoughts and prayers.
Jessica
January 19th, 2009 at 1:53 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. I will be thinking of you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
I’m so sorry. You are in my prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:18 pm
I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my dad when he was 57. That was almost 26 years ago, and I still miss him every day. Like you, I am the eldest. May God keep you and your family in His care.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:22 pm
I’m so very sorry. What a horrible shock!
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
Feedreader de-lurking to say that I am so sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:28 pm
I’m so sorry about your father. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
January 19th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
I send you and your family my deepest sympathies for the lost of your precious Dad.
January 19th, 2009 at 3:03 pm
I am so sorry to hear about your father. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 3:25 pm
Oh, I’m so, so sorry — my prayers are with you and your family, and for safe travels as you all gather together…..
January 19th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
I’m very sorry to hear about your loss. My father passed away unexpectedly from a heart attack as well, so I know how difficult this is for you. My condolences to you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers at this very sad time.
With deepest sympathy,
Susan
January 19th, 2009 at 3:50 pm
Condolences to you and your family. We’ll keep you in our prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
I am a regular reader but usually don’t comment, but I had to take this chance to say how sorry I am for the loss of your father. May you and your family be comforted.
Heather
January 19th, 2009 at 4:49 pm
We are sorry too. You have many friends out here who want to help if there is anything we can do.
January 19th, 2009 at 4:53 pm
I read your blog all of the time but never posted a comment…
I am really sorry to hear about your lost. I don’t anyone has the words you need to hear. I wish your mum the best..
January 19th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
My condolences. Take Care of yourself and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 5:11 pm
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, Jaimie. Know that beyond your friend, family, and loved ones.. you also have a large source of support from readers and colleagues.
January 19th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 6:00 pm
I am so sorry to hear about the sudden passing of your father. Be gentle with yourself and know that you are in our prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 6:26 pm
I’m so sorry to hear about your father, I will be thinking about you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
I just went through this in December – right before Christmas. My thoughts and prayers are with you…and especially with your mother. Good luck with all the little details.
January 19th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
I am so sorry Jamie, you are in my thoughts.
January 19th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
My sincere sympathies. Take care!
January 19th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
I am so so sorry for your loss. Please know that we are all thinking of you during this difficult time and that we will be here when you get back. Many sympathies.
January 19th, 2009 at 7:31 pm
I’m so very sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
January 19th, 2009 at 8:05 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss.
January 19th, 2009 at 8:06 pm
I am so sorry to hear your sad news. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
January 19th, 2009 at 8:13 pm
It is so hard to lose a parent, especially when it’s so sudden. We don’t get to say the things we meant to; there is this feeling of unfinished business. Just know that others are thinking about you and that you have our deepest sympathy. Sending you strength.
January 19th, 2009 at 8:23 pm
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my brother yesterday. He died suddenly of a heart attack at the age of 52 while driving his car. Mere words could never express my sadness and loss. My prayers are with you on the loss of your father.
January 19th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
I’m very sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.
My grandmother passed away just last thursday, apparently from a sudden, massive heart attack. Since it was the day after my father’s birthday, he had spoken to her just the day before it happened…
January 19th, 2009 at 9:08 pm
This is terrible news. I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s bad to lose a parent. And so much worse when it’s unexpected. You will stay in my thoughts. God bless.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:18 pm
I found your blog last week & have enjoyed all that I’ve managed to read since then. I am so very sorry for your loss. The shock of it makes it even more difficult for you to process. Others have said, and I completely agree – you know what’s most important right now & we will be here when you’re ready to write. May God bless you & your family during this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:27 pm
Ouch.
We’ll pray for you and your family.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:29 pm
So sorry to hear about your sudden loss. I’ve lost both my parents at this point and neither was totally unexpected given their health, but it’s still always a huge shock. It’s particularly hard when a parent dies at a relatively young age (my dad was 52) because you think about all the things they still planned to do.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss, especially since it was so unexpected. You and your family are in my prayers in this difficult time.
January 19th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
Jaimie, I am so, so very sorry for your loss. I will send up prayers for your and your whole family for this very difficult thing you are going through.
January 19th, 2009 at 10:29 pm
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time of need.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:09 am
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:22 am
I am truly sorry, my dad was also 58 when he passed, the advice I would give you and your loved ones, is take a deep breath and put one foot in front of the other. Try not to rush thru stuff, my mom went thru cleaning out too soon, she was to raw and now wishes that she had waited awhile and let herself have a chance to think.You and your family will be in all of our prayers and thoughts and I know we all will check here off and on to see how you are doing.You will find that the businesses that you will deal with about the bills will be very understanding, talk to a manager and explain your situation and they will be able to help with any problems, my dad was also the financial center and some companies required a copy of death certificate, but most just helped as soon as we told them what the circumstances were. God bless you and your loved ones during this very difficult time.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:23 am
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother at Thanksgiving and it has been hard. Fortunately I took care of everything financial for her so there were no surprises. Remember to take care of yourself too. It’s important not to get too tired or hungry. My tho’ts and prayers are with you.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:34 am
I’m sorry to hear about your sudden loss. I subscribe to your blog but never posted a comment but this post is an exception.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:45 am
I’m so very sorry for your loss. So young. My prayers are with you all.
January 20th, 2009 at 12:34 pm
I’m so sorry for your unexpected and terrible loss. Peace to you and your family.
January 20th, 2009 at 1:29 pm
My heart hurts for you. I am so very sorry. I’ve been there. I know how hard it is to lose your dad, I lost mine about six years ago and it still hurts. If you need to talk we are all here for you. Take as much time as you need to recover from your loss. The hurt doesn’t go away for a long, long time. Once again I am so sorry.
January 20th, 2009 at 1:58 pm
So sorry to hear of your loss. It is always such a shock. Take the time to be with your Mum and brothers. Treat yourself kindly, Margaret
January 20th, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Our thoughts are with you in this time of loss.
January 20th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
Oh, honey – I’m so sorry. Thinking about you and your family.
January 20th, 2009 at 2:49 pm
My heart goes out to you and your family. You have my deepest sympathy and warm thoughts for you all as you begin the grieving process.
January 20th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
I am so sorry, I can’t even imagine.
January 20th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
I’m so sorry! Will be thinking and praying for your family.
January 20th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
I am so sorry Jaimie I just heard about your dad. Bug hugs!!!!!
January 20th, 2009 at 9:01 pm
We are so very sorry for you and your family. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
January 20th, 2009 at 10:41 pm
I’m very sorry for your loss – I’ll be thinking of you and your family.
Mike
January 21st, 2009 at 9:09 am
I’m very sorry for your loss. God bless you and keep you safe in your travels.
January 21st, 2009 at 10:26 am
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I’ll be thinking of you and your family. Please take care.
January 21st, 2009 at 1:00 pm
I am sorry to hear of your loss. Losing a parent is a very hard thing. you know you can lean on your readers. You are an inspiration to all of us! You’ll be in my prayers.
January 21st, 2009 at 1:55 pm
I am so sorry to hear about your unexpected loss. I lost my father 3 years ago, unexpectedly and it was very difficult for my mom and me. My father was the ‘bread winner’. You mentioned in your post some suggestions on how to handle the financial changes, so thought I would write. My mom works 2 days a week as a hairstylist, not much income, is 65, she was 61 when my dad passed away, at the time she decided to take her SS early and save drawing on his till she was 70 because his would be more and she thought if she could live off her SS and income from her job, then once she is retired she is going to draw on his SS and using his 401K to live on till her passing. His SS and 401 K would make up for the income she will lose once she is retired. She rolled over his 401K to an IRA. She has cut back her expenses dramatically, sold my dad’s car for some extra cushion in the savings, doing so cut the insurance costs, has had yard sales, and has become very thrifty. She was amazed how she survived on $12000.00 a year from her job and her SS and didn’t have to touch their savings. Once again, I am very sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.
January 21st, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Jamie,
I am so very sorry for your loss. I pray for your and you family’s strength at this time.
Mercedes
January 21st, 2009 at 5:59 pm
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I shall remember you and your family in my prayers.
January 22nd, 2009 at 2:52 pm
I’m so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and your family.
January 23rd, 2009 at 1:56 am
Jaimie, I am so, so sorry. Having walked a mile in the shoes you’re wearing now, I know how much this will continue to shake you to your core. Take care of yourself.
January 23rd, 2009 at 1:57 am
Cling hard to the memories, the joy you shared will help you get through this very very hard time.
I’m very sorry.
January 23rd, 2009 at 10:11 am
I’m sorry for your loss.
January 24th, 2009 at 11:40 pm
My family and I extend our deepest sympathies. May you be given strength in this hour of need.
Regards
January 25th, 2009 at 2:22 pm
Just read of your loss. My heart goes out to you.
In 1986, I lost my first father-in-law. Even though it was expected for months, it was still a complete shock. The feeling that happens is almost indescribable. Time just sort of stops. Nothing seems to matter, except for this big hole in your life.
You and all of your family are in my thoughts and prayers.